Please pray for me...

Sounds like decent progress, will pray for no setbacks, brother!

I smurfin\' hate this. I can't sleep because I'm the one that has to press my dope button, so if I miss a dose in a 10 minute increment, I'm in excruciating pain. The gas they used to inflate me so they could see during the operation hurts way worse than the incisions.

So anyway, I was breathing shallow earlier today - brought on by anxiety for the most part - and thought that if I said something about it, they would give me more oxygen or something.
NOPE. Instead, like 10 people (including my wife) freak out thinking that I've got a blood clot in my lungs, take out IV's, put in new ones (a painful ultrasound guided one), xrays, blood tests, CAT scan and get moved to a semi-critical room where I'm hooked up to like 10 machines beeping constantly.

May God confort you thru this time bro

The joys of "critical care"

Will pray for your peace of mind......

My oxygen was less than 90% and heart rate was 140 BPM. Still struggling to manage pain.
Thank you again for your prayers...

Second horrible patient experience today.

They took away my dilaudid and didn't pay close enough attention when the morphine wasn't cutting it. I spent several hours bawling like a little baby (because the pain was so intense) in front of my wife and mom who tried everything to help.

My wife my mom let my nurses have it because they let me be in pain, and I let them have it once the Norcos took the pain down enough to where I could actually speak.

Man, it's particularly awful when the people that are supposed to be helping you get better make matters worse.  Will be praying for your recovery, and that you get some better nurses.

They took my catheter out and now I can't pee. The nurses won't re catheter me because even after 6 hours they can't see my bladder in a scan from the swelling. I've got a few hours before kidney failure or a burst bladder so...
I guess I'm screwed.

Wow. Doctor Hoffman, who helped with my surgery said I can plan on leaving today. As horrible as my night was yesterday, this morning has been awesome!

Wahoo!  Good news!

Not feeling too bad. I'm home. Had a little bit of a fever this afternoon, but that went away. Using some little 3lb weights to help with the referred pain in my arms. I move pretty slow, but I can take stairs and get into bed by myself. I can also empty my JP drain, foley and ileostomy by myself.
It's going to take some time and a lot of pain pills, but I'm sure I'll feel good enough in a few weeks to get off my meds.

Praying for a good And fast recovery brother

Glad to hear you're home.  Hopefully you'll be able to rest and recover better there.  Hospitals are necessary sometimes, but the sooner you can (safely) get out, the better.  Will continue praying for your recovery.

I feel like every day the pain gets less and less.  When I first got home, I was only able to sit on the edge of chairs and for a short duration - now, I can sit in any chair regularly, for a while and be fine.

When they did my surgery, they did a Foley catheter.  This is a tube inserted through my penis into my bladder that collects urine in a bag.  (con - its sensative, pro - makes "peeing" unnecessary.  After 3 days in the hospital, they took it out in hopes that I could pee normally, but I was too swollen from the surgery, so they had to put another catheter back in.

I'm still wearing that even to this day.  This catheter is supposed to come out before my doctors appointment tomorrow.  

Please pray that the swelling has gone down enough that I can urinate on my own.

Obviously, not being able to pee at all is not something that can happen - and if no one has ever had a tube shoved down their penis into their bladder, its pretty horrible each time they have to put one in.  (its still fairly horrible getting it taken out)  I really don't want to have to have a 3rd one put in because I still can't urinate on my own...

Praying for you brother

I had to have a catheter when I was in the hospital a couple of years ago.  Not fun.  Praying that you'll no longer need one.

Ugh.  Praying the situation goes well for you

Today has been hell.
I couldn't pee so urology had to put in another Foley catheter. They took out my top staples and now the hematoma is pushing through, splitting the wound. This could mean anywhere from more bandage changes to another surgery TODAY.

My surgeon was able to suck out 200ml of the hematoma (blood clot) that he could see and packed the wound. It fits an entire whole roll of Gause in it, so it's a huge wound. The muscle is still intact so it looks worse than it is and will need packed twice a day. I don't need a surgery today to fix anything.

I haven't posted in a few days. This relentless pain is breaking me spiritually.
I no longer pray for relief and instead pray for Jesus to just take me home because I can't take this anymore.
I've also vocalized to my brother and my wife that I want to kill myself.

I don't think typing "hematoma" adequately describes the pain I'm in. This pic will probably help those speculating my pain.
Warning, its graphic. You can probably gauge from my belly button how large this is.

Spoiler:

Even worse, over the weekend, my ostomy leaked twice a day into this wound. My skin around the ostomy has broken down and the bags no longer stick, and having literal s.hit leak into the wound f.ucking hurts. Had a temperature of almost 103° today, no f.ucking surprise.

I've gotten annoyed with people praying for me, because its not f.ucking working. Why can I pray and albums just happen, but NOTHING happens when I pray for pain? Actually, the pain has actually gotten worse. I don't give a s.hit about anything when I hurt this much.

Its a good thing I don't own a gun.

Hold on my friend, I will pray for you even thou you don't see the answer now, help from above is on your way

Man, that is absolutely wrenching to hear.  I don't understand why, with those complications, esp the ostomy port issue, you aren't under 24/7 hospital care till that's resolved......that's a potent recipe for sepsis issues.....

Wow, I cannot even begin to try to imagine what you are going through.  That sounds absolutely excruciating.  I will continue to pray because that's all I know how to do in a situation such as this.  Hang in there my friend.  Your life is precious and you are loved by many.  Your presence here on this earth is still needed - especially by your wife.  This will eventually pass - and hopefully very, VERY soon.

Just got home after being admitted to the hospital on Monday. I was pretty dehydrated and had an infection. I got pumped full of fluids and antibiotics and this is the best I've felt since surgery. Still in a decent amount of pain, but pain from a surgical wound is way more manageable than from an infection.

I know that last post was hard to follow, and sorry if I scared or offended anyone. I appreciate the PMs from those offering their condolences. My faith in God or the power of prayer will never waver, but when prayer doesn't work the way I think it should, I get beyond pissed. Obviously that's one of my flaws.

Very thankful to hear that you're doing better.  That is some seriously scary, horrible stuff you've been through.

ThomasEversole wrote:My faith in God or the power of prayer will never waver, but when prayer doesn't work the way I think it should, I get beyond pissed.  Obviously that's one of my flaws.

I wouldn't be too hard on yourself for that.  In a situation like yours or in the face of some other great personal pain or loss, it can be heartbreaking when God doesn't act in the way we want him too.  Even some of great figures of Bible had moments like that.

I just pray and hope that you'll continue to get better.